• A French magazine has posted paparazzi shots of Kate Middleton enjoying a nice day with her husband, sans her bikini top. Kate and William were hanging out at a relative’s chateau last week (like you do) when the shots were taken. Obviously the royal family is pissed, but luckily they are pissed at the correct people: the scummy paparazzo who invaded the remote chateau and the a**hole editor of the magazine who published the photos of a husband and wife trying to relax and have a good time while [seemingly] out of the public eye. [TMZ]
• The editor of the magazine that published the invasive pictures of Kate and William says she has even more intimate photos of the couple, but she hasn’t chosen to run them yet because she is a hero or something. [TMZ]
• Smartly, the royals have filed a lawsuit against the magazine, which has a British counterpart that chose wisely to stay the hell away from the photos. [TMZ]
• Yes, Amanda Bynes was driving with a suspended license again last night and yes, she managed to hit another car. This is not Groundhog’s Day, you’re not living the same day over and over, we’re all going through this together. [TMZ]
• Things might not be so great for Miley Cyrus and the Hemsworth-that-isn’t-Thor. Cyrus put out a bunch of cryptic Tweets yesterday wondering if she loves more than is loved (you know those people on Twitter — the ones that are all vague and sad, posting emo song lyrics until you question them, then they’re all, “Oh, never mind … I’m fine … sigh.”). Cyrus insists she was just musing aloud and that things are okay between the pair. [Daily Mail]
• But perhaps Miley is le lesbian and is slowly coming to terms with it? [Celeb Slam]
• Is Ryan TinyGoose preparing to propose to Eva Mendes? Maybe/probably not! [The Evening Standard]
• Read all about the music played at Blake Lively and Ryan Reynold’s wedding because OMGSQUEEPRECIOUSBARF. [People]
• Here is a fantastic GIF of Emma Watson dancing with Jimmy Fallon for no discernible reason. [People]
• Stacey Kiebler tried on an obnoxious ring on her ring finger and now the Clooney/Kiebler kaput countdown clock has commenced. [TMZ]
• The hot mess that birthed Lindsay Lohan acted like a drunk fool on Dr. Phil and is now mad that people think she’s a drunk fool. [Radar]
• In a shocking turn of events, Lindsay Lohan actually showed up for work. [CeleBuzz]
• Here are some incredibly ugly chairs with celebrities’ faces on them that you can buy so you can make crass jokes about sitting on Brad Pitt’s face. [Buzzfeed]
• An aspiring rapper/role model named Inkyy gleefully Tweeted about driving drunk at 120 MPH minutes before crashing and dying. It’s not known yet who was driving, but all five passengers were killed. [HuffPo]
• Blind item: “WHAT popular Olympic gymnast is ready to trade in her gold medals for an Oscar – or at the very least an Emmy? This adorable brunette is desperate to break into Hollywood and has signed with a major talent agency, but they’ve given her strict orders: You’ve got to lose the attitude, young lady.” [CDaN]
• Blind item: “The issues that this former A list tweener thinks she is having with her B- list movie actor boyfriend probably have to do with a certain person he met on the set of his last movie and also the fact that the former A list tweener keeps questioning him about it non-stop to the point where he is ready to split. He has already checked out emotionally and says he is only in it for the sex and that he gets a threesome for his birthday.” [CDaN]
