Via TMZ
• Alec Baldwin did today what Alec Baldwin does best: attack a photographer on the street. Right now it’s a big he said/he said mess, with each side accusing the other of attacking first. What is clear is that Baldwin was at a New York courthouse obtaining a marriage license with fiancée Hilaria Thomas (lucky girl) when the altercation happened. Look, I don’t care how many suits he wears, or sassy Tweets he sends out, Baldwin is just a hot-headed thug, pure and simple. You can put a dress on a pig, but it’s still a rude, thoughtless little pig, ya know? [TMZ]
• Johnny Depp has split from longtime girlfriend and mother of his children Vanessa Paradis. Hopefully this major life change will inspire him to move on from other things that aren’t working in his life, like Pirates of the Caribbean sequels and Pirates of the Caribbean sequels (stop making Pirates of the Caribbean sequels, Johnny Depp). [People]
• Congratulations, probably, to Bobby Brown, who was married in Hawaii to fiancée/manager Alicia Etheredge. Four of Bobby’s kids were in attendance; the one you’ve heard of wasn’t. [People]
• Remember that little crash Lindsay Lohan was in two weeks ago? Turns out, she had been banned from driving by the company that insured her for the movie Liz and Dick because she absolutely sucks at it. The production company knew she was driving anyway, which is probably why they had a car following her that day. This also explains why Lohan lied to police about driving, putting her in jeopardy of having her probation revoked. No word yet on if the insurance company will pull its contract. [TMZ]
• Yooou sayyy … Lisa Loeb had a baby boy, and you are right. Emet Kuli Loeb Herskovitz weighs 7 lbs., 7 oz. and is 20 inches long, for those of you keeping track in your Celebrity Baby Stats Journal. [People]
• Mike Tyson used to be all about prostitutes, but now he’s vegan. This piece of information brought to you by years of getting punched in the head. [TMZ]
• Marisa Miller is pregnant! Not sure who that is, but I LITERALLY CANNOT CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT, AS EVIDENCED BY MY USE OF ALL CAPS AND MISUSE OF THE WORD ‘LITERALLY’. [People]
Via People
• A photo of Angelina Jolie as Maleficent has been released. She looks good, and it appears this role was well-cast. Related: Is Maleficent a witch? Or a sorceress? What’s the difference between a witch and a sorceress? I hope I figure this out before the movie comes out. [People]
• John Mayer allegedly tried to put the moves on Jennifer Lawrence (who is in a steady relationship with actor Nicholas Hoult) while at Medieval Times. Normally, I’d scoff at Mayer’s feeble attempts to woo someone totally out of his league, but there is seriously nothing sexier than eating with your hands in a roomful of tourists wearing paper crowns. Good luck to you, sir. [Radar]
• Blind item: “In Hollywood, it seems like most of the actors you read about are cheating on their wives. It doesn’t matter who their wife is or what she looks like, chances are she is getting cheated on and probably frequently. Well, this former A list actor and probably still a B- is one of the greatest cheaters ever. There is nothing he would not do to have sex with someone. I think I will focus on the time he was married to the wife before his current one. She is an actress too. A good one. A very good one although people seem to discount her skills for some reason. I think it is because she comes across as an airhead which she isn’t. She just thinks that is what people expect of her in public so she plays to that role.
Anyway, our actor once got his wife drunk so she would pass out and then called over a woman and had sex with her on the bedroom floor with his wife sleeping in the bed. This was a favorite trick of his. He would often get his wife drunk or drugged out so she would pass out and he could cheat. When he was working there was not a day that went by that he did not have sex with someone on set. Most of the time it was someone new everyday, but if someone was particularly intriguing he would have sex with her a few days in a row. Our actor was not careful about using protection during sex and his wife lived in constant fear of what she would catch from him. There was the time our actor dropped his wife off to get her hair done and while she was getting it done at the salon he suggested, the actor was having sex out in the parking lot with the owner of the salon. Our actress put up with it for years. Our actor always said he would change but never did. He would always talk his way back into her life.” [CDaN]
